Here I go

I intend to unwrap my faith and expose that which is eternal.

I am embarking on a treacherous journey of sorts. I am delving into my long-held beliefs and frail faith to discover my true self. That one that is in me and in Him. I am inviting all to share in this adventure that you might also question everything, scrape, prod, rip open and take apart the conceptions and ideas that inhibit our evolution to realizing our inheritance.

Upon closer examination I find common hypocrisy, prompted by the crowd to respond with slogans and cliche’s without thinking. Everything upon which I have relied is suddenly revealed to be a mere reflection of what I have found comforting to my ego. If I am to uncover my truest self all these ideas, preconceptions and formulas have to be incinerated by the flames of Love.

My current endeavor is to bring God’s love into everything I do, every moment. Quite a simple thing to aspire to, but quite another, in its execution. Are not the simplest things more complicated than one originally thought?


This might be self evident, but I first must realize, acknowledge and admit, that I don’t know jack. I am completely inept at at solving anything, when it comes to my self. I must have His help. I have to submit myself to Him, without reservation. Upon setting foot on this path I will be still allowed free will, but as I do me, I will be confronted with my frailties. I will resist, rationalize and justify. All of which indicate where I am deluded. He is a jealous and merciful God.

Upon honest refection of my being, I am appalled at what I find, What of any love do I deserve? Hallelujah! I have been blessed with the greatest gift, that of enough curiosity and willingness to listen and read of the greatest divine sacrifice. I am deemed worthy of the ultimate Love. I only need to ask, and in so doing, I have exhibited Faith, nothing more is needed to receive. There is a bit of a catch, He wants me to seek Him only in all my doings. Being human with a myriad of selfish desires I chase and grasp after things I think will satisfy, these seeming insatiable cravings, and when I do go after them without discernment, I get smacked down, disappointed and left wanting. I then am again desperate, confused and left wondering why I have been allowed to forget the Love that is merely a breath away. (Jealous) Immediately I am forgiven and realize I have been taught. His Love and acceptance are eternal. (Merciful)

This is turning out to be a little more involved than I initially envisioned, I will break it up. Until then All Is Well in His Care

It just doesn’t make sense


So I’ll not attempt to explain, that which cannot be expressed in words. I am content to rest in the soothing way Thomas Merton expresses what is indeed overcoming me.

Lux in tenebris lucet et tenebrae eam non comprehenderunt. (The Light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not understood it.)

“If nothing that can be seen can either be God or represent Him to us as He is, then to find God we must pass beyond everything that can be seen and enter into darkness. Since nothing that can be heard is God, to find Him we must enter into silence.

Since God cannot be imagined, anything our imagination tells us about Him is ultimately misleading and therefor we cannot know Him as He really is unless we pass beyond everything that can be imagined and enter into an obscurity without images and without the likeness of any created thing.”

With devotional practice and following in the footsteps of those I admire something happens.

“Making the simple act of submission to the authority of God, I receive the gift of an interior light that is so simple that it baffles description and so pure that it would be coarse to call is an experience. But it is a true light, perfecting the intellect of man with a perfection far beyond knowledge.”


So to be calm, resolute in stillness appreciating what I can see and what I have experienced, being kind and helpful (if possible) to all I encounter, and forgiving those who are lost in hatred and poisoned by a vindictive heart, and also admitting that I am flawed. I am liberated into a Perfect Peace that Doesn’t make any sense.

I must admit

Yeah it hurts

I am a little embarrassed and humbled to appeal for assistance covering impending medical expenses. I have initiated a GoFundMe campaign

I will be joining neighbors this evening at a nearby park to discuss ways we can help each other and law enforcement keep our streets safe.

It is my contention that we all share in the responsibility for things devolving to the sad state we’re now in. We have been divided into tribal groups which have dehumanized the opposition. The media is helping to fuel the fire in the resulting chasm that separates us. When if we actually encountered each other face to face more often we could overlook, accept, understand and even have compassion each other’s positions on ways to achieve our most cherished objectives to take care of each other.

Share what you can offer freely and do so quietly and pass it on. Any surplus will be donated to the assisting of those suffering from the ravages of addiction seeking treatment.

Nothing New

Nothing New

I can claim no virtue, I am a frightened selfish wretched creature. We all bear The Mark of Cain. I am no better or worse than George Floyd or Derek Chauvin, to claim so is folly and denial of my humanity.

Joy and sorrow are two sides of the same coin. Peace and Violence are with us and will be until the Lion lays down with the lamb.

Start here and now to be better, we are responsible for placing those who appall us into power. Don’t fall into the trap of what is popular, the abyss is not far off

All is as it should be.

In time…

When I am still and out among the creatures, attending to their inherent tendencies, a peace overcomes me and I realize that sometimes there is nothing to be done


“Once you know yourself as the light, you will find that inner peace dominates every situation. It’s not that you will never feel fear, anxiety, or anger, but you will no longer get lost in your pain.”
― Panache Desai

in time

In time
I’ve been tempered,
absorbed by the flow
of nature’s perfection
and heavens attentive glow…

I traveled way too fast over fields of isolation,
only pausing for a moment
in divine imagination…

on returning
to the center,
I bathed in pools of bliss,
astonished by the harmony
where fear does not resist…

awoken in the small hours
confronted by my dread,
I counted on the darkness
to let the unseen tread…

The time lords reminded me
that we are
all made of light,
vessels of abiding love
waiting to ignite…

My calling is between the lines
of melodic sounds
and words,
scribbled by the azure skies,
spoken out by…

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You decide

Hi everyone! I hope this post finds you well, I am healthy, blessed and grateful. What I am about to assert may astound some, soothe some and hopefully most will find this to be true, however haven’t considered, that we choose how and what we are affected by.

I was engaging in meditation, this time sitting, silently bringing attention to my breathing and my body. As usual I start at my feet feeling the floor under then and moving up…some of you know how this goes so I’ll get to my point. I wondered, could I be conscious of my entire body at once? Try as I might I found that I could only bring attention to specific parts. I found also that some exterior force could affect a change and I could at that point find it nice or annoying, delightful or painful. Like the warmth of the sun on my skin on a cool day, or a biting breeze on a frigid morning.

I could also at this point choose to allow it to bother me or to recognize it and “lean into it” if you will and feel it deeply and be grateful that I am dressed accordingly and carry on with what I’m doing outside. Probably shoveling snow. and now on to the juicy part.

I contend that we make choices to be stimulated in a manner that is either enjoyable or aggravating to us depending on our mindset, perspective or belief. We choose to be offended, outraged, incensed. the “information” being disseminated in the media is an example. Then find ways to share with others our particular bent that agree with us for validation. The same is true for those such as myself that seek out more pleasurable stimuli, choosing to ignore most of it as noise and observing the madness face in palm. Knowing that it’s going to be alright.


You decide!

Sound Familiar?

Ha! I’m back. I am returning from a hiatus of sorts, due to my not being in any kind of distress or despair. I have realized I am creative when I am in doubt or am in some way desperate.

I am taking this time of upheaval and uncertainty to get back to basics, in a manner of speaking. I am being more disciplined about my daily devotions and reading. I reread Awareness by Anthony de Mello, which I have read many times and, as in the past It was like the first time, finding and seeing things I had missed or wasn’t in the proper attitude to receive.


I am now reading New Seeds of Contemplation by Thomas Merton. This is my second foray in to this wonderful composition. He is such an exquisite and thorough writer. I aspire to write only partially as well, as I like to say “it’s better to aim for the stars and land on the moon, than to aim for a mud puddle and hit it.”

The point of this is to place here something I believe is evident in the sad state of our society today, it is an excerpt from the second chapter, What Contemplation is Not, of the previously mentioned book.

Here it is “…the experience of being seized and being taken out of oneself by collective enthusiasm, in a totalitarian parade: the self-righteous upsurge of party loyalty that blots out conscience and absolves every criminal tendency in the name of Class, Nation, Party, Race or Sect. The danger and the attraction of these false mystiques of Nation and of Class is precisely that they seduce and pretend to satisfy those who are no longer aware of any deep spiritual need. The false mysticism of the Mass Society captivates men, (and women) who are so alienated from themselves and from God that they are no longer capable of genuine spiritual experience. Yet it is precisely these ersatz forms of enthusiasm that are “opium” for the people, deadening their awareness of their deepest and most personal needs, alienating them from their true selves, putting conscience and personality to sleep and turning free, reasonable men (and women) into passive instruments (tools-useful idiots) of the power politician.

Photo by Gerd Altmann on

I must examine myself as well, as to my being drugged and having lost the longing to find/discover my true self. I can only hope I have not and that I am willing to hear from anyone who might think so and also hopefully be willing to admit my flaws. At least now I am attempting, however failingly to to encounter my true self at the peril of the external temporary ego driven socially conditioned mind.

That is all for now I hope this has piqued your curiosity and will add your perceptions from your perspective.