Winners and losers

In the interest of being able to persuade others to their side and hopefully arrive at a majority, in the perceived interest of their constituents. A division is created. What if someone has a great idea for most if not everybody, except that this someone has the opposition’s party affiliation? It then becomes evil and the greatest atrocity ever imagined. Sadly it cuts both ways.

From my perspective and in action. I choose to attempt indifference to the insanity going on in our nation’s capital. My aim is to smile and to be at peace with myself. Be kind to, and understanding of those I encounter. Help when I am able, say no when I cannot. This I pray will ripple out from here and impact more than I am aware of.

Comming to grips with and accepting that no one does anything that is not motivated by self-interest is key to understanding the motivations of leaders and followers. We all desire to be on the winning side. But what if the people you follow are not being completely honest? They’re human and are self-interested, so I’ll just attend to what I have influence over, namely me.

With gratitude, generosity, and love. Peace be with you all and may God bless all you endeavor.

 

Demolition precedes Renovation

I am reflecting on this year. I started writing here about this time last year. My eyes and being have been subject to a wonderous eco-system of artists, entrepreneurs, visionaries and downright hilarious expressionists. All here to get out what can no longer be contained within.

Mine is a journey of ongoing and perpetual self-discovery and, hopefully, growth. None of which occur when things are going according to my particular sensitivities. I have found that before I have exhausted all of my self-determined solutions and am in complete despair I am unable to surrender.

Demolition

Upon the occasion of surrender and acceptance of my inability to do anything of my self. That part of me must be demolished in order for a renovation to begin. Recovery does not take a linear path. There are pauses and serious faults found along the way where construction is halted, the architect is consulted and a diversion in the path is found suitable. The result, though is spectacular. An ever increasing gratitude and willingness to embrace the mystery of this mortal sentence is uncovered.

 

I am so blessed to be alive, willing and able to feel and express how lucky I am to be here. I wanted to be different than I was. I surrendered, asked for help performed the demolition, evaluated what was of any use, repaired the fractures in my relationships and am growing up.

Merry Christmas the wait is nearly over and All you have needed and will ever need is inside you right now. If only for the obstructions built by self-will. Ask for and accept help…Cry Out! Help is only too ready to assist.

My Frailty

frail·ty ˈfrā(ə)ltē

noun

the condition of being weak and delicate.

“the increasing frailty of old age”

weakness in character or morals.

plural noun: frailties

“all drama begins with human frailty”

I have all my needs provided for or acquired. I find myself craving more. As the result of paying close attention to my desires and potential drives behind them. I have found that I can never really have what I am hoping to possess in some way. I have yet to figure out why I become obsessed with what I can really never have in the way I imagine.

I am in fact sure that if I did get it, I would no longer want it with the same passion that I wanted for it in the first place. What is it about me that I contort my principles to appeal another that I might be found in their favor, while at the same time the reaction to me is one of ambivalence or perhaps even indifference. It leaves me wanting it even more

image source Google images

While all along there are those that are available, yet there is only mild interest on my part.

I think I am afraid to make authentic connections and receive the Love an appreciation that I’m not sure I deserve but should.

Perseverence

On we go to the next in my series. Sound principles to live by. At this point, I’ll recap from where I’ve delved in this honorable endeavor. Surrender, Honesty,  Hope- Great, so Now What? , Faith, Courage, Integrity- How does that lead to Integrity? , Willingness , Humility- Right Sized , Brotherly Love- Love , Justice and now Perseverance. This is the result of working Step 10 Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.

At this point, my first time through, it was very important to consciously take time at the end of my day to consider interactions with others and in situations. I had plenty of help from my sponsor and people I admire if I had questions. If I have to ask, then there certainly was something to set straight. Again there are no more I’m sorries. I faced up and admitted what the infraction was and offer to make it right.

Wildflowers pop up in the most unexpected places…In the middle of someone’s lawn.

There is great power in admission. Or I should say I keep my power when I admit. I am reminded of what I like to refer to the Hippopotamus syndrome. If someone says something untrue about me like You’re a hippopotamus, I’ likely to laugh, but if something true is stated about me and I thought I was being sly and keeping it to myself. I will get angry and defensive. I will argue and give up my power in what ensues. So I tend to just admit it even if it is not true. I can never comprehend other’s perception. I try to understand what they see and say it.

More wildness

“We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition.” Alcoholics Anonymous. Doing this ongoing check is part of how I stay spiritually fit. There is much more to that in the next installment.

Consider the patience and vigilance until they find something to grab onto

Today, after 18 plus years I am much more sensitive and am quick to feel it when I wronged someone and done something I shouldn’t. I consider it miraculous.