Gazing at the Light

The lamps are different,
But the Light is the same.
So many garish lamps in the dying brain’s lamp-show,
Forget about them.
Concentrate on the essence, concentrate on the Light.
In lucid bliss, calmly smoking off its own holy fire,
The Light streams towards you from all things,
All people, all possible permutations of good, evil, thought, passion.
The lamps are different,
but the Light is the same.
One matter, one energy, one Light, one Light-mind,
Endlessly emanating all things.
One turning and burning diamond,
One, one, one.
Ground yourself, strip yourself down,
To blind loving silence.
Stay there, until you see
You are gazing at the Light
With its own ageless eyes.

– Jalal-ud-Din Rumi

DailyOM

Ineptitude

Today I was prompted by a new author I follow by his post A lonely thing- Quotes of the King

The take away for me was that I have manifested “ghosts and monsters” in my own persona from my resistance to serious consideration of my own ineptitude in relation to my creator Yahweh. To say it is uncomfortable to consider one’s flawed perfection severely understates the human condition.

Today we celebrate!

 

Death could not contain Him so we color eggs and discount what the real meaning is. This is, in my opinion, another example of avoidance of our true nature, inescapably human. I am relieved of my affliction through the admission of my sin (imperfection) and turning to Him as an example, through his teachings. From there the truly miraculous occurs. I begin to live a life free from regret, I can forgive, be generous without consideration of “what’s in it for me?” and gain tremendous gratitude for what I have, which is provided, I can proceed anxiety free believing that my needs will be provided for.

 

Just as the Flowers are beautifully arrayed and the birds don’t stockpile for another day, neither should I. Matthew 6:25-34 & Luke 12:22-32

God Bless you and thank you!

Can you hear that?

Shhh, Be quiet and very still. It’s there a gnawing ache, scratching from within. A hunger, but that’s not quite it. A Longing, an emptiness, a vast pit of despair. If you’re honest, and I trust, that to be difficult, if not impossible, to admit.

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image source Google images

There is, though, a certain freedom in admitting that it is there. I have done the very thing to irradicate this agony. Use of any number of distractions in the form of substance abuse, activity, striving for status and adulation, etc. It all left me hollow and even more desperate. It has become my belief that this is in all of us, placed there by God, that we might seek Him and gain His Peace in the mere seeking.

 

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Michelangelo’s Creation of David in the Sistine Chapel

There is a slight problem though, alone again with my humanity I can’t endure the shame of my imperfection next to His supremacy. I am saved though by Yeshua’s sacrifice. Today we celebrate that event, solemnly, reverently, searching for the release from that fault.

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Good Friday

It is True to me

Thank you, Papa, for your Love ❤

An Apparition

A mirage of sorts, though it can’t be seen or even concretely described. I know it, feel it and can almost taste it. When I can capture it and possess it for my own, I will finally feel relieved of this wretched craving. Therein lies my affliction. Reliance on created things for solace.

As soon as the slightest acknowledgment of my existence is perceived the twinge of hunger evolves into an insatiable need. It must fill me up. I know well the error of my ways. I consistently regularly want what I ultimately can never have. As much as I chase cajole attempt to persuade bribe or buy and as close as I think I might be to quelling this thirst the object of my desire vanishes, evaporates turns to dust, or realizes the futility of my endeavor and erects a barricade of silence which I dare not penetrate.

I correctly assign the blame squarely where it belongs, right here with me. Things money, status, the adulation and “love” from beings will always disappoint and it’s not their fault. I have established an impossible feat for them to achieve. Being highly sensitive the initial sensation that touches is exhilarating and is what leads me to abandon any sense I might have ever had.

The solution though is readily available and inexhaustible. It is of course “The Source” God, Abba, Yahweh, Allah, it is the same in whatever language, culture, the religion where the gift of your faith abides. It is our essence It is eternal. I must only stop, thinking, doing, striving, and most of all grasping, wishing to possess. That is all “the world” The eternal is within me and around me, apart of me and I a part of it.

As long as I continue to “use” the urges will never subside and the onset of withdrawal starts as soon as I try to quit. Resistance is futile and surrender is the highest and best option. I don’t want to, and so it goes.

Please Help Me, I am nothing without You

May your day be as it should.

 

Love

Continuing with my venture into describing principles acquired, developed, learned, what have you, recovering from addiction. It is my assertion that the 12 steps and the order they are in, are divinely inspired. All of the previous steps and principles are needed to make progress to the next.

So we’re at step 8. Made a list of all the people we harmed and became willing to make amends to them all. 

Old timers say that the principle here is brotherly love, there seems to be a bit of debate about this as I have seen a few others. Willingness, discipline among others. I contend that it truly is Love. 

I have realized that what I do to or for others I inflict or provide to myself. My spirit is damaged or enriched by the actions I take toward others. Even just in thought.

If I am to heal my being and become a decent human, able to interact and function in society. I must be rid of the hurt I have caused myself and others. Writing down the names of those I have harmed and becoming willing to bridge the chasm created by my behavior is an imperative exercise on the road to recovery.

Contemplating the love of God is invaluable in this undertaking. God knows my heart and all of my history and Loves me. I must do, be that love to work through this.

 

Oh boy, this is going to hurt.

How much more discomfort will we (society) have to endure, before we are authentically ready to put our differences behind us and find what values we share? A great deal I’m afraid. If my experience with change is any indication, it’s going to hurt quite a bit.

It’s is much more comfortable to be occupied with just barely surviving our hectic life, taking care of all of those commitments we have decided are priorities. I understand, my life is crazy and I have made some horrendous decisions that have put me in a less than preferable, situation at this time. I am confident it will all work out for the best, and hopefully this time I will integrate the lesson.

Things are really getting ominous in the greater world and it seems to me as though, our “leaders” are more concerned with dividing us and keeping their precious positions of power than doing what’s is best for all.

Now that, I am sure, is as diverse as humanity in the minds of many. To me, though, I really believe there is more that we share, even from opposite ends of the political spectrum than that which we might disagree is important. Here is a piece from something I read this morning.

 It is only as we meet and share together person to person, eye to eye, and heart to heart that we discover what it means to be human and to discover the joy of being together, working together towards a common mission of peace and unity. It is only moving from winning and loneliness to collaboration, and from hostility to seeing enemies as friends, that we discover the real meaning of peace.

I can commit myself to all of you that I will do my part and promise you, all of you who are reading this right now and those I encounter on my path. I will listen and relate to you with an open mind to find what we share. I will not attempt to change your mind and I will respect that the way you perceive the world is your reality and likely not the way I see it. I can, however, love you as a fellow human with similar frailties and hardships. We need each other now, more than ever.