What is it, then?

Photo by Victor Freitas on Pexels.com

I detect a theme emerging in the recent writings of bloggers I follow. My thoughts were on the notion that what I am doing is not obedience. It is neither submission or acquiescence. I have been trying to put my metaphorical finger on it. As with, literally everything pertaining to each one’s faith, including my own, to attempt to describe it accurately fails miserably with words.

So what is it? My initial answer was a kind of collaboration, but that’s not it, exactly. I was letting these things percolate with the catalyst of mental and verbal prayer and scripture reading, with some blog reading. Here https://insanitybytes2.wordpress.com/2021/01/16/wisdom-from-an-intermediate-noticer/ and here https://jtjustteri.wordpress.com/2021/01/15/gathering-the-scattered-thoughts/

It is in my experience awareness in utter humility. That’s It! I have read Anthony de Mello’s book Awareness countless times and it hit me like (insert any metaphor here) “a ton of bricks” today. The complete realization of my smallness in relation to creation. In addition to the incomprehensible miracle of the humanity. Yet at the same time if we’re in keeping with the teachings of Jesus and the wisdom from the Old Testament. Being small can be incredibly powerful, in our immediate sphere of influence, and beyond, even if, and especially if I possess no intention, other than living a joyous life trying my best to attend to God’s will before my own. Which can only happen in Awareness.


Look, I don’t want credit for things I should be doing. I am also contemplating being helpful while avoiding drawing attention to myself. In so doing I am finding a seeming inexhaustible energy. Bear with me as I am just cataloguing some of the richness I am experiencing lately. I have realized a gratitude for even the trials and sorrows I have experienced. I wouldn’t be who I am without any miniscule part of it.

The Beauty and the Beast table read

I have a role which I was specifically and miraculously designed for. There are no rehearsals and I am only witness to it unfolding a moment at a time. So onward with The Ultimate traveling Partner, yet “In silence before Him I become Aware of what I am to do in service, that I might reveal to all I encounter the magnificence of his Love and power to transform, a frightened, selfish, wretched creature into something other…you tell me, I am dwarfed in awe here. “Love and Trust are the solvents for life that I might not resist the opportunities presented when they are revealed.

Sometimes there is nothing which captures it

Published by jeffw5382

Stumbling spiritual pilgrim on my way from here to here. Recovered Addict, US Navy Veteran. Sharing my journey of self discovery, in the spirit of service, generosity and gratitude.

5 thoughts on “What is it, then?

  1. Beautiful, Jeff. Well said. I like what you said about having a “seeming inexhaustible energy.” I’ve found that to be true too. Anytime I’m actually resting in the Father’s will and doing what He wants, I have abundant energy and the ability to get done the little things I’m supposed to do. Jesus says, “my burden is easy, my yoke is light.” Anytime it feels heavy or makes me tired, it’s not His yoke. In my case it’s usually an extra bag of rocks I went and picked up that don’t even belong to me.

    I also like how they say “our sole purpose is to give glory to God.” Well, sometimes sitting quietly in the midst of a storm is what gives glory to God. It feels like a little thing, but it can move mountains spiritually and also strengthen and encourage untold others. All you’re really doing in the physical world is sitting, abiding, or standing, but just having people around you doing that can change your whole life.

    Liked by 1 person

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