It’s not For Sale

As much as it may seem or as much as I pretend to have gained through the ravages of active addiction and the process of recovering from it. I still feel like a pathetic fool and a fraud. There is something below in my psyche that tells me I have a price to pay and must suffer humiliating groveling for attention. That I don’t deserve to be treated better.

I have only experienced glimpses of peace, the kind that can neither be bought, sold or bargained for. I know what I should do but simply don’t. Holding out hope that things will change and it will all fall together blissfully.

Lord, I pray now that you strengthen the frail faith that I might truly rely on You wholly

 

soaring
Soaring

I was blessed with a gift this afternoon. I was witness to this glorious creature providing for itself. Gliding ever so gently circling down toward the river’s surface and finally grabbing a meal like the fish just swam intentionally to become dinner.

I tried to capture the event but somethings are not meant to be and become treasured events that represent a turning point. The eagle does not worry about what it has done or what it deserves. He is merely provided for through being what he/she is.

A little while later I discovered this pair in an urban neighborhood proximate to the river. Moments like these make me realize how small I am in the greater scheme of things and that a smile and a kind gesture will go farther than any complaints I might have.

I know I’ve featured this one before but it is touching me now

Let the music here touch your soul

 

 

17 thoughts on “It’s not For Sale

  1. Recovering from addiction takes time however, it all started the minute the substance was put down. I have been sober and drug free for over 32 years by God’s grace and mercy. The desire to drink or drug has not come back. Thank you God. I invite you to keep on your path and look for the blessings in you and around you.☺

    Liked by 1 person

  2. It hurts my heart to hear you dont have self love in your heart. Addicts are not bad people we sought a bad solution for an inner problem and then when sobriety came if we were open to grace we took that gift with both hands… Please remember you are a beloved child of God and that you have value, please. ❤ ❤ ❤

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I think we all struggle with that inner voice that does not know how to love I think in the eagles flight you sense something beyond that, something open and majestic as a symbol of your spirit which longs to fly…. but earth is full of trials. Love to you VS ❤

        Liked by 1 person

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