Those were the words of Roger B. at The Retreat in Wayzata The Retreat
His words stuck home with me that day in November 1998. I was done and had finally reached the point where I was “willing to go to any lengths to get it” I had to want to be “done” in order for any of the suggestions proposed by 12 step programs to work in my life.
If I hang on the delusion that someday, I will be able to drink and maybe smoke a little weed and I will not at some point be “on the hunt” for a hit, I am a goner.
It is I am told the great obsession of every addict to be able to use or drink without consequences.
Those days are long past though and I have discovered, that it wasn’t the using that was the problem. I was the problem. I am super sensitive and have chasm within me that is insatiable and drug and alcohol were the only things that dulled that ache. I describe it here The Longing
As long as I think I can use something, somebody, some activity to quell that craving I am a slave in chains to it and will use any means to at least try to calm the desire to feel whole.
Peace be with you! ❤
And Peace be with you. :p
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🤦♂️🤡
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Mea Culpa….tabernacle… *descends into fake Latin*
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I’m just a clown tryin’ to keep my head above water, humor helps
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ditto. 🙂
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Its a love shaped hole and must be filled with love, hopefully after we travel down as low as we go with all the mistaken paths we take looking in the wrong places, asking for others to fill what they cannot that is what we find and it heals us deep within. ❤
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Thanks for the reminder, good start to my day. Peace
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Personal experience. Prefer saying what I did or am doing than saying what I think you should
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Helpful info. Fortunate me I found your website by chance, and I am surprised why this twist of fate did not came about earlier! I bookmarked it.
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In my opinion we have to be led to a state of utter despair before we can truly surrender our self defeating ways
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